Let me know if you need anything, except don’t

I am retraining my brain and writing this to hold myself accountable. I have noticed myself overextending, offering myself and my time to others. A phrase I say a little too much is “Let me know if I can do anything or if you need anything”. And don’t get me wrong, I love being there for people. But there’s a point when you can take only so many trauma dumps in a day and go running to the rescue of so many friends when you have your own needs to attend to.

My new go-to phrase, or the phrase I’m trying to use more is, “I can see how that’s a lot. YOU GOT THIS!” Not only is this encouraging, but it also takes the weight off me and back on the individual, encouraging independence.

We need to keep taking care of ourselves. You are not a mean person for taking a step back and setting boundaries of what you can and can not handle. It is easy to get wrapped up in other’s needs. Remember that you are only in charge of your feelings and your actions, not others.